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So, I’ve been trying to get signed on with the Navy to do a stint as a doc for them. In a fit of what I can only describe as the most egregious display of pure optimism since Bush landed on an aircraft carrier, waved a flag, and said “right boys, nice work, we’re off home soon,” I imagined that my prior service would make it easy to go back in. After all, the administrative harpies that rule the U.S. military with an iron claw already have every piece of information about me that they possibly could. Hell, I seem to recall having every wrinkle in my body inked and pressed into paper at some point, although that might just have been a really good party, now that I think about it. I mean, how many bloody times do you need to take someone’s fingerprints? Do they change? Wouldn’t it be better just to ask where I’d lived and worked since I’d been in and, just in passing, had I planned the violent overthrow of the United States Government (hello FBI! Sorry about that last sentence, but glad you’re here) in the meantime? I actually filled out more paperwork to get back in than I did when I was running around with automatic weapons on a fine USAF installation.
On a related note, it seems that the U.S. military is having a bit of trouble recruiting enough doctors to serve. Here’s a thought: don’t make me fill out more paperwork to get into the military than I did to have to get into medical school! Here I am, motivated as crap to don the uniform, and a bunch of administrative wankers are holding up the process. Now I was in the military long enough to know that, in the event of a national crisis, we can all shelter behind the massive stacks of paperwork that admin types use to justify their jobs, but I can’t help but wonder if a brand-new applicant faces the same hurdles. Pictures of servicemen grinning like idiots, playing golf, and riding around on jetskis with improbably good-looking girlfriends will only carry recruiters so far before the more astute applicant begins to notice a marked propensity for bugger-all getting done on the paperwork front. Streamline the bloody process and you might find that a few more people are willing to step up and fix the broken bits on those who have been put in harm’s way.
Christ, second post and it’s already turned into a rant. You lot are in for a right treat, it seems.
Yes, that’s the reason I’ve decided to write a blog. To be absolutely honest, it’s mostly because I’m entirely too lazy to actually sit with something as archaic as a pen and paper to write out my thoughts. While I have no illusions that anyone other than myself will give a monkey’s about what’s going through my head, I do derive some amusement from the idea that occasionally some errant internet traveller, lost beyond hope of redemption in the internet wilds, will stumble across my words and then head screaming back into the wilderness. Since I’m also off to medical school here shortly, and will be spending some time in the military (again), perhaps the occasional post I make will cause Google to send a unsuspecting denizen my way. If that’s you, welcome. If you’re interested in my military or medical experiences, I’m happy to relate them. If you’re here to complain, bugger off; this is my party and I’ll dance how I like. Right then, off we go.
